Social Media, Phones and Teen Anxiety: A Guide for Parents

Social media and phones do not cause every teen’s anxiety, but for many high schoolers they make it worse: through lost sleep, constant comparison, group chat drama and the feeling of never being off. Blackburn Clinical Services offers one-on-one therapy in West Los Angeles for teens 13 to 17 whose anxiety, mood or sleep has become tangled up with their phone, and family sessions to help parents and teens reset together. This guide summarizes what pediatric and public health experts say, and what you can do at home.

What the research says

• Almost every teen is online. The U.S. Surgeon General’s 2023 advisory reports that up to 95 percent of youth ages 13 to 17 use a social media platform, and more than a third say they use it “almost constantly” (Surgeon General advisory).
• Heavy use is linked to worse mental health. The same advisory cites a study in which adolescents who spent more than 3 hours a day on social media faced double the risk of poor mental health outcomes, including symptoms of depression and anxiety.
• Frequent use is common among high schoolers. In the 2023 Youth Risk Behavior Survey, the CDC found that 77 percent of U.S. high school students used social media at least several times a day, and frequent use was associated with more bullying, including online bullying, and more persistent sadness or hopelessness (CDC).
• Pediatricians focus on the whole teen. The American Academy of Pediatrics emphasizes overall well-being, sleep and family conversations over strict screen time numbers, and offers a free Family Media Plan (AAP).

These studies show associations, not proof that a phone caused a particular teen’s anxiety. In practice, we look at how your teen uses their phone, what it is replacing, and what it is helping them avoid.

Signs the phone is part of the problem

• Your teen is on their phone late into the night and exhausted in the morning.
• Mood shifts sharply after time online, or after a group chat or post.
• They check constantly, get panicky without the phone, or cannot get through homework without scrolling.
• They compare their body, grades, friends or college plans to what they see online.
• They have been left out, targeted or embarrassed online and do not want to go to school.
• Arguments about the phone have become the main conversation at home.

What therapy at Blackburn looks like

• An assessment first. We look at anxiety, mood, sleep, school, friendships and how the phone fits in. Sometimes heavy phone use is the coping strategy for something else, such as social anxiety or depression.
• One-on-one therapy in our office or by secure video for clients located in California. Your teen builds skills with a therapist in person or by secure video for clients located in California, using CBT, ACT and DBT skills for anxiety, comparison, rumination and urges to check. See anxiety treatment.
• Family sessions. Parents and teens work out phone rules together, so limits feel fair rather than punitive, and parents can look at their own habits too. See family services.
• Psychiatry. Psychiatric care can be arranged when a teen needs an evaluation or medication.
• Weekday sessions. Monday to Friday, 9 AM to 5 PM, scheduled within those hours around school.

What parents can do now

• Make a family media plan together rather than announcing rules. The AAP Family Media Plan is a good starting point.
• Keep phones out of bedrooms overnight and put them away at least an hour before bed, as the Surgeon General advisory recommends.
• Protect device-free meals and time together, and model it yourself.
• Ask what your teen sees and who they talk to, with curiosity rather than alarm. Teens are more likely to tell you about a problem online if they do not expect to lose their phone for it.
• Watch for bullying, sextortion or pressure to share images. If it happens, save evidence, do not blame your teen, and get help.
• If phone fights are constant or your teen panics without the phone, it is a good time to call.

When phone habits sit on top of constant worry, teen anxiety treatment in Los Angeles explains how we help.

When to get urgent help

If your teen is in danger right now, call 911. If your teen talks about wanting to die, is harming themselves, or you are worried they might, call or text 988 to reach the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline, any time of day. Online bullying or threats that leave your teen afraid or hopeless deserve a same-day response.

Questions

Should I take away my teen’s phone?

Taking the phone as a punishment often backfires and can make teens hide problems. Most families do better with agreed limits, such as no phones overnight in the bedroom, plus help for whatever the phone was helping your teen avoid.

Is social media addiction a diagnosis?

It is not a formal diagnosis, but compulsive checking and losing control over use are real problems we treat, often alongside anxiety, depression or ADHD.

How much screen time is too much?

There is no single number for every teen. The Surgeon General advisory notes higher risk above 3 hours a day of social media, and the AAP focuses on sleep, school, activity and relationships. If phone use is crowding those out, it is too much for your teen.

Can parents join sessions?

Yes. Family sessions are a big part of this work, because phone rules affect everyone at home. Your teen also has one-on-one time with their therapist.

My teen is being bullied online. Can you help?

Yes. We help teens cope with the anxiety, shame and fear that online bullying causes, and help parents think through next steps with the school, which we contact only with your written permission.

Get started

You can also email info@blackburnclinical.com or contact us. Parents usually make the first call; your teen does not need to be on the line. More guides: therapy for private school students.

Sources

• U.S. Surgeon General: Social Media and Youth Mental Health advisory (2023)
• CDC: Frequent Social Media Use and Experiences with Bullying Victimization, Persistent Feelings of Sadness or Hopelessness, and Suicide Risk Among High School Students (YRBS 2023)
• American Academy of Pediatrics: Center of Excellence on Social Media and Youth Mental Health
• 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline